David's Journal

It started out as most days do: I woke up, dragged myself out of bed and turned on the computer to check my emails. That reminds me - send me more emails. Since the temperature and humidity here (and its just spring) are bordering on the ridiculous, I switched the air conditioner on and enjoyed a lovely morning afternoon email checking (no new emails).

Now when the air conditioner is on, it also sucks humidity out of the air, converting it to liquid and depositing it down a hose that inexplicably ends in the corridor outside the room. So a bucket is required to put the hose into to catch the water. This bucket fills up every couple of days and requires human intervention in the form of emptying it.

This job fell to me today which initially seemed harmless enough. I took the bucket, relieved it of its contents then went to place it back in its position only to find that it had been obscuring a SPIDER THE SIZE OF MY HEAD. I categorically deny that at this point I screamed like a little girl. No that came later when I carefully replaced the bucket and it ran with blistering speed from behind the bucket and into the best possible position for jumping onto my neck and paralysing me with a quick bite before wrapping me in silk and hanging me in its subterranean lair. Fortunately it camped itself in this position and waited there, possibly it considered me unworthy prey and wanted to wait until Grant came home and there was two of us to provide more of a challenge.

When Grant came home we took some ropes and set about trying to simultaneously lasso its forelegs. After a titanic struggle and much crashing and banging we finally managed to subdue it and put it in a large plastic container with holes in the lid. The next day Grant took it to school to scare small children with it and then released it into the wild to resume controlling Taiwan’s stray dog population. I kind of miss it.